Should Old Acquaintance Be Forgot?

I’ve never really been much of a New Year’s kind of girl. When I do go out to celebrate, the results are generally disastrous and serve as fodder for my stories of my rotten luck. But I do love the closing scene in “When Harry Met Sally” when Harry starts questioning the lyrics to “Auld Lang Syne”. I can’t hear the song and not think of that scene. They same is true whenever I hear the phrase, “Waiter, there is too much pepper on my paprikash.” To be fair, I am usually the one saying that one and “But baby fish mouth is sweeping the nation”. Great writing should be quoted often regardless of its relevance.

I have been thinking about all my friends this holiday season. Wondering if I am a loon for forging out on my own with little to no safety net. I have been discovering the profound instability of friendships I thought I had here. And I have been thinking, as I usually do around my birthday, of all the men that have drifted in and out of my life. What I never realized is that the poem from which this song derives its lyrics actually is asking a rhetorical question. Should old acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind? I guess it depends on the acquaintance.

Before I left LA, I had coffee with an ex-boyfriend. It was benign enough. He managed to make one remark as we were leaving that tweaked my little brain for a week or so. I was recalling the conversation to a friend and she said, “When you go to Nashville, do me a favor and don’t unpack him. Leave him in California.” These were wise words. For me, the believer that I can make anything work, it is difficult to look at anyone or any situation and walk away feeling that I did all I could. That it would never be any different than it is. As I have gotten older, I have become more accustomed to leaving well enough alone. My heart, my trust, my loyalty are easily won. But I am both too young and too old for them to be easily kept.

I have been feeling quite self-absorbed these last few months. Consumed with trying not to feel as unsettled as I actually am. And I know that as I settle, it will be easy to forget those that I love. Or at least forget to keep them an active part of my heart and mind. I think that is the point of the poem. Reminding us not to forget those who have shaped us, loved us, cried with us, laughed with us, etc. As we grow and change and walk down new roads and face new adventures, we must guard against the real danger of forgetting who shared our path. For good and for bad.

I had a chat with the Captain of my store today. (The equivalent of a general manager just keeping with the nautical theme) He was talking about mistakes. Making them, learning from them, and not fearing chastisement for having made them in the first place. He said something that was so lovely; I wanted to write it down. Now I fear that I will not quote it accurately. He said:

We must start each day excited about the adventure of making our next magnificent mistakes while being vigilant not to repeat our old ones.

So that is how I would like to start this New Year on this silly little blog. I want to wish you all blessings and joy in this coming year. And I hope that you look excitedly forward to your next grand mistakes. Remember those that have made you who you are. Don’t unpack the ones that mess with your head. Keep your heart soft. And determine now that this time next year, you will either being crying tears of joy or sorrow as you look back on 2011. Otherwise, you just might have wasted your time.